


Bentley Did Not Sign Up For This

by Brightest_Moonstone



Series: The Trope Pit of No Return [2]
Category: Sly Cooper (Video Games)
Genre: Bentley POV, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-25
Updated: 2018-03-10
Packaged: 2019-03-23 18:54:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 13,942
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13794048
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Brightest_Moonstone/pseuds/Brightest_Moonstone
Summary: Inspector Carmelita Montoya Fox was a problem, a problem that Bentley was intent on fixing.OrThe three times Bentley failed to get Carmelita transferred and the one time he succeeded.





	1. The Setup

**Author's Note:**

> Hello again. Welcome to yet another ridiculous SlyFox fic.
> 
> Poor Bentley, he has too much deal with
> 
> This was so much fun to write. I hope you enjoy.

The first time Bentley decided that Carmelita Fox had to go was the first time he laid eyes on her. He’d heard Sly talk with starry eyed wonder about the gorgeous and impressive Interpol agent he’d run into when the gang had first arrived in Paris and Bentley had nodded, quietly assuming they would never see this young woman ever again.

Then she’d shown up in Mumbai.

Sly had just picked up the Fire Stone of India and scrambled up out of the temple, Bentley had confirmed their rendezvous and then a very loud and very angry female voice had echoed through the night.  
“Stop right there Cooper.”

“Inspector Fox, how lovely to see you again.” Sly said his voice slightly strained and breathless. 

Bentley swore and Murray cast a worried glance over his shoulder from the driver’s seat. “Is Sly okay?”

“That remains to be seen, the law’s just showed up.” Bentley muttered. He adjusted his mic to yell into his headset, “Sly get out of there.”

“As much as I would love to stay and chat Inspector I really must be going.” Sly said and Bentley heard some of Sly's usual composure return to his friend’s voice.

Bentley heaved a relieved sigh as he heard wind rushing through the comms as Sly ran. “Okay Sly now that that's done…”

Sly interrupted, unfortunately it seemed things were decidedly _not_ done. “She’s on my tail Bentley." He said. "Close on my and gaining… whoa.” There was a loud crackling noise. “I’m going to try and shake her.”

“No Sly, stick to the plan.”

“I don’t want to lead her back to you guys. Give me like two minutes.”

Bentley pushed his glasses up to scrub at his face. “Fine. Two minutes.” He turned to Murray. “Sly says he’s going to try and lose Inspector Fox.”

Murray hit the gas, “right.”

Two nail biting minutes later, the comm burst to life, “okay Bentley I’m in the clear. I’m coming to you guys now.”

Bentley confirmed that they were in position and as he prepared to open the doors, he heard Sly exclaim in surprise.  
“She found me Bentley.”

“Wha…? What?” Bentley spluttered.

“Whoa!” There was another electric crackle through the headset as a blast from the Inspector’s shock pistol zipped over Sly’s head. “Open the doors Bentley I’m coming in hot.”

“Don’t stop Murray.” Bentley yelled leaping up and flinging open the doors of the van. He saw Sly, a dark blur moving swiftly from one rooftop to the next and right behind him, jumping through the air with almost the same grace that Sly himself possessed was Inspector Fox.

Bentley hung on for dear life as the van hit a rut and everything bounced dramatically, “Sly.” He called.

Sly dove for the back of the van, catching onto the roof and swinging himself inside. He shot Bentley an easy grin and then turned to wave to Inspector Fox.  
“Until next time Inspector.” He even dared to blow her a kiss.

The ground behind them scorched as the Inspector fired off another shot, Bentley scuttled back. Sly reached for one of the doors and began to pull it closed. Moving back up to do the same on his side Bentley risked a glance at Inspector Fox still running from rooftop to rooftop, hair streaming behind her until she ran out of roof. She pulled to a halt, shaking a fist as the van pulled further and further ahead.

This woman was dangerous, Bentley realised. Smart, capable and far too much Sly’s type.

Yes, Inspector Fox had to go.

 

It was no small feat to hack into Interpol’s computers and bring up Inspector Fox’s personnel file. A few keystrokes later and Carmelita Fox was assigned a new city and a new case and Bentley was able to put her from his mind. The transfer would go through soon enough and that would leave the gang free to collect the stolen pages of the Thievius Raccoonus.

 

And so of course, she had shown up in China.

“Hey guys.” Sly murmured quietly into his comm. “Carmelita’s here.”

“WHAAAATTT???” Bentley spluttered nearly falling out of his seat. He brought up the visual feed from Sly’s binocucom and sure enough, there was the Inspector rugged against the cold, creeping through the Panda King’s base. “How? I mean what is she doing here…?”

“Hey Bentley, Bentley calm down. It’s not a big deal, Carmelita always shows up eventually.”

“Yeah.” Bentley grit his teeth, “she always does, doesn’t she?”

Bentley needed to get back into Interpol’s system and find out what had gone wrong. Unfortunately, it would have to wait until this business with the Fiendish Five was done.

 

The second time that Bentley decided that Inspector Fox had to go was in the aftermath of Clockwerk’s defeat. Her help may have kept Sly alive but her opinion of the gang appeared unchanged and that was one thing... but then Sly had kissed her!

A distraction, Sly had said, tossing the key to her cuffs up and down in his hand. Nothing personal, he’d said.

 _Nothing personal Bentley’s green shell_. Sly hadn’t needed to kiss her; if he wanted to cuff her inside that volcano, he could have done it, easily. He had only kissed her because he’d wanted to.

It worried Bentley how attached Sly seemed to have grown to Inspector Fox, a dangerous thing given that she wanted nothing more than to see the three members of the Cooper Gang in jail for a very, very long time. 

_It was for the best_ , Bentley told himself as he pulled up Carmelita’s file once more. Apparently she’d appealed to her boss about the transfer and Chief Barkley had vetoed it. And unfortunately for Bentley his hacking skills were not yet so great that he could bypass the Chief’s authority. He would need to come back to this endeavour.

Bentley stared at Inspector Fox’s picture, she was very aesthetically pleasing (she had excellent bone structure), she was also as evidenced by her impressive arrest record, list of promotions and commendations… utterly brilliant.

In another life, Bentley thought it might have been nice to get to know her. She would not be an intellectual equal to him (few were) but with her quick and calculating mind she would have made a worthy friend. Bentley sighed, closed the window, and shut his laptop, there was no point in dwelling on hypotheticals even if in some alternate reality there was a Carmelita Fox who was dear friends with the Cooper Gang, there would still only be one member of the gang who would get her attention. Girls always went for Sly, Bentley thought bitterly. That’s just how it went.

Although Sly had never seemed as interested in the other girls they had known as he was in Inspector Fox.

Just another reason she needed to not be chasing their gang anymore, Bentley didn’t want Sly’s infatuation getting them all arrested. Bentley stowed his laptop away, he would have to come back to the problem that was Carmelita Fox until then he would just have to keep an eye on Sly and hope that his brother didn’t do anything stupid.

 

The third time Bentley decided that Inspector Fox had to go was on a job in Monaco. The three members of the Cooper Gang had successfully completed their heist but had missed their ferry and Sly had volunteered to distract Carmelita until the next one.

Bentley groaned, sinking his face into his hands as Sly cast off his security guard uniform and bounded away. “He’s doing this on purpose isn’t he?”

“Oh heck yeah.” Murray nodded.

“I knew it.” Bentley grumbled. “Let’s head to the secondary rendezvous, with any luck Sly will have managed to keep himself out of handcuffs until we get there.”  
Murray chuckled as he finished prepping the van, “right. Ready when you are little buddy.”

 

Sly had left his channel open so Bentley listened in for sounds of trouble as they made their way to the rendezvous point. From what Bentley could tell Sly wasn’t running from Carmelita, rather he was engaged in a spirited discussion about morality as the two of them reminisced about the night they had met.

Sly was also flirting outrageously.

Bentley heard Sly compliment Inspector Fox on her dress and then he heard her, her voice quieter and distorted because of the distance snarl back in response. 

They continued in this vein for some time until something in Sly’s tone made Bentley lift his head.

“You are incredible, you know that?”

That wasn’t one of Sly’s cheesy, overblown pick up lines. He meant that.

“Flattery will get you nowhere Ringtail.” Carmelita’s voice was suddenly a lot clearer and louder as she responded.

“Is it really flattery if it’s true?” Sly said softly.

Bentley started to sweat, he’d known Sly since they were eight years old, he knew every nuance of his speech pattern and he knew he was being really and truly, terrifyingly honest.

“Sly…” Carmelita started to say, they must have been standing very close now.

“You are just the most interesting and fascinating person I’ve ever met.” Sly continued.

 _Oh jeez_ , Bentley groaned to himself. _Panic stations_. He grabbed his headset and yelled into the comm. “SLY! SLY DO YOU HEAR ME?”

“Ugh.” Sly grunted and Bentley could only hope he’d had the intended effect and ruined whatever moment Sly thought he was having.

“Coming up on Sly’s position now Bentley.” Murray called out. “I can see him on the bridge with Carmelita.”

“Roger that Murray.” Bentley replied jumping up from his seat.

They stood at the edge of the little boat as it drifted toward the bridge, and yes, there was Sly standing less than an arm length from Carmelita. No tenseness, no fear in his posture whatsoever, utterly at ease and relaxed in the Inspector’s presence.

“He is going to make the jump to right?” Murray leant down to whisper. “Like he does remember that we’re coming for him?”

Bentley squeezed a white knuckled grip on his binocucom. “I hope so.” He said grimly. Sly only had a window of a few seconds to get from the bridge to the boat without Carmelita following or Sly drowning in the canal.

They began to pass beneath the bridge, Bentley could still hear Sly and by extension Carmelita in his earpiece.

“You don’t have to run.” Carmelita whispered.

“I think you’ll find I do.” Sly was smirking, Bentley didn’t have to be able to see his friend’s face to know Sly was smirking.

“You could stay, help, do things right.” 

And Bentley might not have known Carmelita as well as he knew Sly but he certainly knew yearning when he heard it.

“For you… maybe.” Sly said.

“C’mon Sly make. The. Jump.” Bentley muttered to himself as the boat cleared the bridge and kept moving.

“But not today. Goodnight Inspector, until next time.”

Bentley felt a great wave of relief as Sly vaulted the railing to land lightly on the deck on the boat between his gang members. A panicked Carmelita had rushed to the rail and upon seeing the three of them safely sailing away her worry twisted into fury.  
“I’ll get you Cooper!” She yelled. “I’ll find you.”

Sly lifted his cap waving enthusiastically. “Wouldn’t have it any other way Inspector.” He called out. “Wouldn’t have it any other way.”

Bentley looked between the angry Inspector in her dark formal gown and yellow jacket and Sly with his wistful smile and Bentley knew then, once and for all. Inspector Fox had to go.

 

Interpol had upgraded their internal cyber security since the last time Bentley had hacked their systems and after two days of scrolling red error messages and discordant access denied noises, he was ready to kill something. In the end the best Bentley could do was bring all her vacation days forward and flag them to be used immediately (and Inspector Fox had A LOT of unused vacation days) hopefully that would buy enough time for Bentley to figure out a more permanent way to get rid of Inspector Fox.

 

The fourth time Bentley decided that Inspector Fox had to go was the real kicker.

Bentley was in the hideout watching a hijacked security feed of the lair Sly was infiltrating on his monitors. “Okay Sly, it’s a left up ahead and then a right at the next junction after that.” He said.

“Left gotcha. No heavies?”

Bentley flicked through the feeds from a few more of the cameras. “No. There aren’t any guards at all in your area.” 

“Yeah… that’s not suspicious at all.” Sly murmured back. “Well let’s count our blessings now and worry that it’s a trap later.” 

Bentley watched the slightly blurry black and white image of Sly shrug. “Just be careful.” Bentley said. “And make sure you do exactly as I say.”

Sly laughed, “don’t get your shell in a knot Bentley, everything is fine.”

Bentley groaned, because that phrase had never heralded utter disaster before. He marked Sly’s progress on the floor plan in front of him and flicked through the feeds again checking for danger. Then he saw where all the guards in this area had gone.

“Sly take your next right, Inspector Fox is just around the corner and she’s got all of Boss Medio’s guards on her tail.” 

Bentley watched Sly straighten, watched his ears perk. “Carmelita’s here? She’s in trouble?”

“Ehhh…” Bentley squinted at the screen watching as Carmelita leapt up, kick flipped a guard in the face and kept running. “She looks like she’s handling it.” He said. “Since Inspector Fox is being kind enough to distract the guards we should use this opportunity to get to the safe and get out.”

“I should take the next left you said?” Sly asked, Bentley could see him standing head cocked, his whole body canted slightly to the left.

Bentley relaxed, oh thank god. It seemed like Sly was listening for a change. “Yes your next left, under no circumstances keep going the way you’re going or you’ll run right into them.”

Sly nodded. “Got it.” And then he ran straight down the hall intercepting Carmelita and her pursuers. “Hey ugly, that’s no way… to treat… a lady!” Sly yelled his cane connecting solidly with two guards jaws. He wrapped his fingers around the Inspector’s wrist. “Quick this way.” And he pulled her down the nearest corridor.

“No Sly, what are you doing?” Bentley scrubbed his hands over his face. “Just leave her.” He hissed into his comm.

There were alarms blaring everywhere now and Bentley watched as panicked guards rushed hither and yon looking for the intruder and the escapee. Then Bentley realised that he’d lost sight of Sly and Carmelita, worse still Sly had turned his comm off. Bentley leant forward until his forehead was resting on his desk.  
“Oh jeez.” Bentley took a deep breath and sat back up. “Okay Sly where are you?” He cycled through the different camera feeds until he found Sly and the Inspector evidently having hidden in some small, dark storeroom (why there was a camera in there who knew).

They were squeezed together hidden behind some shelves, Sly was pressed against Carmelita casting worried glances over his shoulder. The coast was clear outside and Sly would have known that if he’d kept his damn comm on. Sly looked back at Carmelita, and Bentley would have given his left leg to know what they were saying, whatever it was Carmelita was not impressed judging by the way she bared her teeth as she spoke. She was letting Sly stay awfully close, Bentley noted. Which was unusual as surely it would have been safe enough by now to put some distance between the two of them. 

Bentley couldn’t say for sure what happened between on moment and the next, he looked away, only for one second switching between the feeds checking for guards and when he looked back at Sly and Carmelita still hidden in their dark corner the two of them were kissing… enthusiastically.

“Oh my God!” Bentley muttered horror struck, he even took off his glasses to polish them and rub his eyes just in case there was some kind of mistake, some trick of his vision but no it was definitely happening. 

Sly Cooper and Inspector Carmelita Fox were making out like teenagers and they were not showing any signs of stopping.

Finally Bentley turned off the feed, there were some things you just didn’t want to see your brother doing. In the meantime, he pulled out his laptop and began the now familiar procedure of pulling up Inspector Fox’s personnel file.

She’d voided her vacation days. All of them.

Clearly she was a madwoman.

She was obsessed.

And she was currently trapped in a closet with Sly kissing him like the world was coming down.

She had to go.

No more stopgap measures, no more leaving loopholes she could find, no more putting this off.

If making Carmelita Fox go away for good meant that Bentley had to hack the Director of Interpol’s personal computer then so be it _!_

If Sly wanted to play with fire then Bentley would wield the extinguisher. Bentley would protect his friends, even from themselves.

 

After a little while Bentley’s comm crackled to life, it was Murray though not Sly who addressed him.

“Hey Bentley, Sly is on his way out. I’ll grab him at the rendezvous and we’ll head back to the safe house.”

“Finally came up for air did he?” Bentley asked dryly.

“Huh?”

“Nothing Big Guy. I’ll see you when you guys get back.” Bentley said going back to his infiltration of Interpol’s computers.

By the time Sly and Murray tumbled back into the hideout, Sly empty handed but grinning smug and triumphant and Murray frowning looking more than a little confused. Bentley was packing up his laptop, anger as it turned out was an excellent motivator and Bentley had torn through Interpol’s firewalls like they had been made of paper.  
If this didn’t work, nothing would.

“Hey pal.” Sly greeted him like nothing was wrong. “Sorry things got a little out of hand.”

“Yeah what happened?” Murray asked.

“Sly went off the plan.” Bentley muttered.

“Oh.” Murray looked at Sly who just shrugged.

“There was a lady in distress and I’m a gentleman.”

“That was no lady, it was Inspector Fox.” Bentley exclaimed. “You could have gotten yourself killed Sly.”

“It was fine.” Sly soothed, coming forward to pat Bentley on the shoulder. “Everything worked out.”

“Apart from the fact that the whole operation was a blow out? We didn’t even get close to what we came for.” Bentley folded his arms, glaring.

“There’ll be other heists.” Sly began walking away, twirling his cane.

“There was a camera in that storeroom.”

Sly froze mid-step. “Ah.”

“This is dangerous Sly.”

“It’s fine.”

“What happened?” Murray asked looking between the two of them.

“Carmelita kissed me.” Sly smirked.

“Wow really? Way to go.” Murray grinned, holding out a fist for Sly to bump.

“Don’t encourage him.” Bentley squawked.

Murray wasn't listening, he was looking at Sly. “What did you do?”

“Nothing really.” Sly rubbed the back of his neck a little sheepishly. “She… uh.. told me not to say anything but I mean it’s just you guys so I guess it's fine.”

Murray slapped Sly on the back, sending Sly staggering. “Nice work.”

“No.” Bentley interrupted. “Not ‘nice work’. Sly you ignored me, turned off your comm, disappeared and completely disregarded the plan. And for what?”

Sly’s grin turned dreamy and distracted, tilting his head back for a moment before he looked back to Bentley. “Look Bentley I’m sorry, I mean it but I had to help. For what it’s worth, I don’t think Carmelita will let me get that close again in a hurry. This won’t happen again.”

 _No_ , Bentley thought as he watched Sly’s back as his friend wandered away toward the bedrooms. _No, it absolutely won’t_.


	2. The Plan

The next heist the Cooper Gang pulled Inspector Fox didn’t show up, or to the one after that nor the one after that. 

Bentley was elated, things were running smoothly for the first time in months. Sly however was not so happy, he slunk around ears drooping, looking like a child who had been told Christmas had been cancelled.

“Stop moping.” Bentley told him as the three of them sat in their favourite Paris hideout, open boxes of pizza spread across the table before them.

“I’m not moping.” Sly muttered stuffing another piece of pizza into his mouth. “D’you think she’s sick?”

“Maybe she’s on another case?” Murray suggested innocently.

Sly choked on his pizza and a panicked Murray leaned over to wallop him on the back. “You don’t think it's that do you?” Sly wheezed.

Bentley shrugged feeling an odd twist of guilt in his stomach that put him entirely off his pizza. “I guess we’ll see.”

 

The fourth heist the Cooper Gang pulled after Bentley had successfully sent Inspector Fox away was when the law finally caught up.

Alarms were screaming throughout the once quiet museum and Sly was running, a priceless diamond necklace clutched in his hand.

Bentley was wondering if Sly was a little off his game or if he was deliberately stalling. Usually Sly could initiate an exit strategy in 28.5 seconds, tonight however nearly a minute and a half had elapsed and Sly was still inside the museum.

Bentley and Murray were sitting in the van, waiting out on the street. Bentley fidgeted worriedly, _what was taking him so long?_ Adjusting his headset, he hit the control panel for the comms. “Sly you need to get out of there.”

“Working on it pal.” Sly said shortly.

“Do you require the awe-inspiring power of THE MURRAY to come rescue you?” Murray yelled from the driver’s seat.

“No. Do not send Murray in here, I can get out on my own… whoa.” There was the sound of Sly’s boots squealing on the polished marble floor as he skidded to a halt. “Just gotta find a way that’s not crawling with guards or cops.”

“Sly we’re going to get hemmed in here. You have to get out of there so we can make a break for it before they finish setting up the roadblocks.” Bentley prompted hoping a reminder of the danger all three of them faced might encourage Sly to hurry up and move his striped tail.

“Told you I’m working…” Sly trailed off.

Murray looked over his shoulder, “where did he go? What happened?”

The connection was still live Sly had just fallen silent. It sounded like he’d stopped moving too. Bentley waited, _had Sly been seen? Why had he stopped?_

An unfamiliar male voice drifted through Bentley’s speakers. “Good evening Mister Cooper, at last we meet.”

“Who are you?” Sly asked stonily.

“Senior Inspector D’oro, Interpol.”

“Oh.” Sly’s tone immediately changed back to his usual light-hearted one. “Well that’s okay then, with an introduction like that I thought you were a Bond villain.”

“Sly please don’t taunt the law.” Bentley hissed.

“You’ll have to excuse me.” Sly was saying, once again ignoring Bentley. “I’m used to a different, more attractive member of law enforcement.” And Bentley could picture Sly tilting his head as he spoke. “Is she around?”

D’oro snorted, “you had best concern yourself with your own fate boy. Inspector Fox isn’t coming back.”

“What?” Sly whispered horrified. There was the sound of movement Sly had evidently decided not to stay and banter further.

“Sly?” Bentley said. “Sly are you okay?”

“Yeah Bentley, all in one piece. Give me a sec tall, dark and grizzled is following me.”

“Oh no are you…?”

“I’m fine. I’ll be with you guys in a minute.” 

He sounded tense, certainly less thrilled by the prospect of the chase than he was when Carmelita chased him. And sure enough a few minutes later Sly was climbing back into the van and the three of them made a clean getaway.

Sly didn’t speak, sitting in the front seat, knees pulled to his chest one foot twitching agitatedly, a deep frown on his brow. They arrived back at the hideout with a screech of tires and clambered out of the van. Sly tossed the necklace carelessly to Murray and fell into step with Bentley.  
“Bentley I need a favour.”

“Uhh sure Sly what?”

“I need you to get into Interpol’s computers for me.”

Bentley squirmed guiltily, “ummm mayyybee.. why?” As if he didn’t already know.

“I want you to look up this Inspector D’oro, he told me Carmelita wasn’t coming back and I want to know what he meant.”

“Sly…”

“Bentley please.” Sly took off his hat to run his fingers restlessly through his hair, Sly could never be still when he was nervous, always moving, fidgeting. He was really worried. “I know this is a lot to ask but I need to know what’s going on here.”

Bentley sighed, “okay I’ll see… I’ll see what I can do.”

Sly relaxed a little clapping Bentley on the shoulder. “You’re the best pal, the absolute best.”

Bentley felt ill for a moment then resolutely pushed the feeling aside. No, he’d done what was right. He was protecting his friend from himself.

This was for the best.

He hoped.

 

By now, Bentley was pretty sure he could hack Interpol’s system with his eyes closed but he didn’t let the other members of his gang know that.

He hadn’t taken the time to look over D’oro’s records before and the man was intense to say the least. A brown furred timber wolf with notable scarring across his muzzle and through one eye, one of his scars pulled his lip up giving him a permanent snarl. His records were not particularly impressive, lots of undercover work but few notable arrests. He was in his forties, no family listed and he had apparently been recruited in Lithuania.

“Nikolai D’oro.” Sly read over Bentley’s shoulder. “Transferred from Russia? He didn’t sound Russian.”

Bentley went digging, “born in Helsinki, Romanian mother, Italian father. Father was military, family travelled a lot. D’oro joined Interpol after abandoning a military cadetship.”

Behind them Murray whistled. “This guy sounds hard-core.”

Bentley pulled up the personnel file again. “Says here he’s been reassigned to Paris and is currently the lead investigator on Sly’s case.”

“Yeah but why?” Sly said. “Does it say anything about Carmelita?”

A few keystrokes and Carmelita’s file was on the screen.

Sly gripped both of Bentley’s shoulders shaking him gently. “You’re amazing pal.”

Bentley hummed scrolling down the page until the ‘current assignment’ section was visible. “It says here Inspector Fox is in… Moscow. Assigned to the Usurper Taskforce.” Bentley read out. Well that made a certain amount of sense since he’d just swapped Carmelita and D’oro’s assignments.

“Moscow?” Sly echoed. “What? Why? What’s the Usurper Taskforce?”

“I guess it’s her new case.” Bentley shrugged.

“They have her chasing some other criminal?” Sly spluttered, highly affronted.

“Are you jealous?” Bentley raised a brow and Murray sniggered.

“No.” Sly said sulkily and entirely unconvincingly.

“Sure.” Bentley nodded. He attempted to bring up the details of the Usurper Taskforce, they were locked down tight but that was nothing to Bentley’s newly refined hacking skills. “Interpol Moscow taskforce, Codename: Usurper.” He read.

“Sounds cool.” Murray said enthusiastically. “Like something out of a spy film. What do they do?”

“Says here they are tasked with bringing down the crime ring of one Boris Korsakoff Dobromir Morozov, a Russian crime lord.”

Sly snorted. “That's a name and a half. Got a rap sheet on this guy Bentley? Betcha he can’t be half as good as us.”

“Boris Korsakoff Dobromir Morozov," Bentley read, _Sly was right that was a mouthful_. "Also known as Boris the Enforcer. Also known as ‘No Witnesses’ Morozov. Also known as Korsakoff the… cop killer…” Bentley trailed off and behind him, both Sly and Murray sucked in a worried breath. “I’m sure it’s just… reputation thing, you know guys like this make up titles for themselves all the time. I doubt he’s actually…” Bentley scrolled down and stared at Morozov’s rap sheet. A thickset black furred moon bear glowered in the mugshot, he had an almost square head and pair of scowling yellow eyes, which even from a picture made a tremor run down Bentley’s back. This was not a man who made empty boasts.

Beneath the picture, huge swathes of the rap sheet had been censored out and there was a short note advising discretion if one wished to continue reading.

“Investigated for extorting widows and orphans… something, something only the informant’s ears were found. Something, something nuns and dynamite… something about a fire?” Sly said squinting at the screen trying to piece together Morozov’s crimes from the small scraps of information that had not been omitted because they were too gory.

“I don’t understand.” Murray said, “how did he kill someone with a rubber duck?”

“Served ten years for… nature of the crime is too graphic to put into writing?!?!?” Sly drew back. “Warm up the van Murray we’re going to Russia.”

Bentley sat there for a moment trying to process that he had sent Inspector Fox to the worst possible posting in Europe. The sound of Sly clattering around the hideout brought him back and he blinked, “what? Sly no.. wait.”

Sly had already turned away from the computer and crossed the room, he was picking up bits and pieces that he’d left scattered over the hideout like he was preparing to pack.  
“What?” Sly asked grabbing his second favourite set of lock picks off the table.

“What do you even think you’re going to do?”

“Help.” Sly said simply. “That Morozov guy is bad news Bentley, you saw all the things he’s done.” Sly gestured. “We can’t just leave Carmelita to deal with that all by herself.”

“But she’s not by herself, she’s there as part of a taskforce, with Interpol. You know her job.”

Sly hesitated, he looked forlornly over at Bentley, “we can’t just….” 

“I doubt Inspector Fox needs saving Sly.” Bentley said, maybe trying to convince himself as much as Sly. 

“Yeah maybe she’ll solve the case all by herself and then she’ll be able to come back.” Murray put in.

Sly’s shoulders drooped. “I suppose.”

Bentley got up to pat Sly on the back, “I understand that you’re worried but I’m sure Inspector Fox will be just fine.”

Sly hesitated, “sure.” He said finally. “You’re right.” And he turned and walked from the room.

Bentley closed down his computer, it was for the best. All of this was for the best. Sly would thank him one day.

Maybe.

Possibly.

If Carmelita didn’t get herself killed by a dangerous and violent gangster… God Bentley had wanted to get rid of her but not like this.

_No_. Bentley slapped a hand down firmly on his desk causing Murray to turn and look at him. “Sly will be fine.” Bentley said aloud. “And so will Inspector Fox.”

“If you say so.” Murray murmured unconvinced.

He did say so.

This was for the best. It had to be.

 

So a month went by, then two, then three.

And for the Cooper Gang things had never run so smoothly. No more fraught chases, no more hastily reverting to Plan B or Plan C with the law no longer doggedly on their heels Plan A worked every single time.

Bentley just wished Sly didn’t seem so depressed by that.

 

“Something’s not right with Sly.” Murray said one afternoon as he and Bentley tinkered with the van in the garage of their hideout.

“He just needs a challenge.” Bentley said as he recalculated his satellite array. “A big job with a nice shiny prize and he’ll be right back to his old self.”

“You think?” Murray’s voice echoed strangely from where his head was stuck in the engine bay.

“I know he’s upset about Carmelita but it was an infatuation, it never could have gone anywhere besides you know what Sly’s like he’ll see another pretty face and forget all about Carmelita. He’ll get over it.”

There was a long pause, “I dunno Bentley. He seems pretty out of it.”

He did but Bentley wasn’t worried about Sly, really. Sly would be fine, he would.

God Bentley hoped Sly would be fine.

 

The newspaper hit the table with a ‘whump’ and Bentley looked up to see Sly beaming.

“What’s this?” Bentley asked pulling the paper toward himself.

Sly leant across to tap the front-page headline, “a heist.”

Bentley frowned at the newspaper, the photo was of a bespectacled goat shaking hands with an elegant ermine coated stoat. The article beneath was about an imminent art historian from the Louvre being loaned to the Hermitage Museum in St Petersburg to assist with a special exhibition of…  
“… the world’s most expensive Fabergé egg?” Bentley read out. “Beloved memento of the lost princess of Russia.” Bentley cocked a brow. “A national treasure from a public museum? That doesn’t sound like your usual style Sly.”

“I’m going to give it back.” Sly said with a shrug. “Maybe I’ll take a few selfies with it first.” He grinned cheekily at Bentley.

“The Princess’ Egg is now only displayed once every ten years for ten days on the anniversary of the princess’ disappearance.” Bentley continued. “Originally a gift from the Dowager Tsarina to her beloved granddaughter, after the child was kidnapped a popular story circulated that the princess had escaped her captors but had lost her memories. The Dowager donated the Egg to be placed on public display in the hopes that the Princess would see it and regain her memories and come home.” Bentley lowered the paper back onto the table. “Are you sure about this Sly?” Bentley had his suspicions that this proposal was less about the thrill of a once in a lifetime heist and more to do with the geography.

“Why not? We can do it.”

“I’m sure we can I just happened to notice where this heist will take place.”

“St Petersburg?” Sly said with what Bentley suspected was a deliberate sort of blankness. He looked at Murray. “Do we have bad blood there and I’ve forgotten?”

A confused looking Murray just shook his head and shrugged.

“No Sly, Russia… where Inspector Fox is?”

It was Sly’s turn to lift a brow. “You think this is about Carmelita? Wasn’t she posted to Moscow? Y’know literally hundreds of kilometres away from St Petersburg. It’s hardly as if we’re just going to bump into her on the street.”

Bentley gave Sly a dubious look, Sly did have a point but all the same, Bentley wouldn’t put it past Inspector Fox to show up, just to ruin all of Bentley’s hard work.

“The exhibition will open with a gala next month.” Sly said bringing his hands together and rubbing them gleefully. “We are going to be there.

Bentley folded the paper away. _Well_ , he thought to himself, _wasn’t this exactly what he said Sly had needed? A big shiny prize and a challenging high stakes job_.

And by the looks of it, this job would have both in spades.

“Alright.” Bentley agreed. “We go to Russia.”

 

St Petersburg was bitterly cold and the Cooper Gang arrived early, a few days before the gala so that they could set up, Bentley was happy to spend that time holed up in the safe house under a thousand blankets whilst Sly ran all over town snapping recon photos.

The night of the gala arrived and Bentley sat in the living room in front of his computer watching the feed from Sly’s binocucom as guests poured into the museum.

“How’s it going Bentley?” Murray asked kicking the ancient radiator in the hopes of coaxing some more heat from it.

“So far so good.” Bentley nodded.

The video suddenly began zooming in on one of the guests and the plunging neckline of her dress, there was the sudden sound of Sly’s voice in Bentley’s ear. “Look at the size of that rock.” Sly’s binocucom lingered on the woman’s diamond necklace. “I could set us up for retirement with like…a quarter of the bling that’s on display here.”

“Sly focus.” Bentley said absently, the words more habit than anything else. Honestly, it was nice to see the old Sly back, Bentley had known he’d be fine. “Thanks Murray.” Bentley said accepting the mug of hot coffee Murray passed him. He took a long sip then choked, coughing and spluttering, spraying coffee and spit all over his computer monitors.

“Bentley?” Murray asked worriedly slapping him on the back.

Wordlessly Bentley pointed at the screen but Sly’s gaze had moved on. “Sly.” Bentley wheezed. _Ow, hot coffee out his nose, ow that stung!_ “Go back, slowly twenty degrees to your right.”

Obediently Sly panned his binocucom back across the crowd.

“Hey isn’t that the scary guy?” Murray asked pointing.

An enormous black furred bear in a perfectly tailored designer suit surrounded by a team of superfluous looking bodyguards filled the screen. He had a beautiful ermine stoat on his arm and was moving through the crowd talking with her, head bent low.

“Huh.” Sly said with deliberate lightness. “Would you look at that. I wonder what he’s doing here?”

Bentley recognised that tone. “You knew.” He accused. “You knew Morozov would be here.”

“Yeah sure Bentley, I somehow managed to get a hold of a terrifying Russian crime lord’s schedule without asking you for it.” Sly said sarcastically.

“You… you…” Bentley couldn’t actually argue with that. “This is about Carmelita isn’t it?”

“Jeez Bentley and you say I’m the one with her on the brain.” Sly said moving on into the museum. “What are the chances she’s even here anyway?”

“Carmelita always shows up eventually.” Bentley muttered sourly. He sighed, _no, it would be fine_. They had a job to do, none of tem could afford to be distracted least of all Bentley himself. “Alright Sly, I can trust you to stay on task right?”

“C’mon Bentley am I a professional or what?”

“That’s debatable.” Bentley ribbed, pulling up schematics for the main room. “Okay can you move into your second position?”

“Already there.” Sly said confidently.

“Remember you’ll only have a forty-five second window between the alarms being turned off so they can allow the guests in and the guards entering the room.”

“Chill out Bentley forty-five seconds is like a week. I’ll be in and out in like fifteen seconds. Tops.”

For once Bentley didn’t argue against his friend’s overconfidence, Sly sounded more upbeat and enthusiastic about this job than he had about anything the Gang had done in the five months since they had last seen Carmelita so he let Sly have this. Even if it was statistically impossible for Sly to get into the display room, cut the glass, secure the Princess’ Egg and get out again in only fifteen seconds.

 

The sound of Sly’s laughter wove through the wailing alarms as naturally and familiar as an old song and Bentley let himself relax a little. If they could just get through this job, get clear of Russia and get back to Paris then things could hopefully go back to normal.

And god, Bentley was looking forward to things going back to normal.

 

“Do you think that the princess ever got her memories back?” Murray asked knees drawn up to his chest staring at the Princess’ Egg placed on the table of their safe house. It looked supremely out of place amidst the pizza boxes and Bentley’s scattered papers.

“They made a kid’s movie about that didn’t they?” Sly asked leaning next to the window, alternating between admiring his handiwork and casting restless glances toward the city skyline. “One with lots of singing and a feel good happy ending?”

“Yeah.” Bentley nodded, “they showed it to us at the orphanage once. Sly we should really think about getting out of town.”

“Why?” Sly shrugged. “That’s just what the locals will expect us to do and that D’oro guy won’t be here for days if his pattern holds up. I think we should just lay low here for a little while.” He looked down at the Princess’ Egg twinkling gold and blue beneath the apartment's single bare bulb. There was a softness on his face as he continued. “Did you know the Princess’ Egg has never left Russia? Something about cultural significance. It.. it doesn’t seem right to try and take it too far now. I’ll wait ‘til the morning papers get wind of the story then I’ll find someplace to return it.” He kicked his cane up into his hand, spinning it casually. “I’m going for a run.” He said.

Bentley turned to look at him. “What? Sly that doesn’t sound like a great idea… Half the city is looking for us.” As if to illustrate his point there was the sudden wail of a siren as a police car drove by outside.

But Sly, entirely unconcerned was not sticking around to argue the point. “I’ll be back before dawn.” He said disappearing out the window.

Bentley frowned, “he’s up to something.”

“You think so?” Murray asked wandering into the kitchen to make a snack.

“Yeah I just haven’t figured out what yet.”

Murray shrugged and began assembling some sandwiches, “Sly knows what he’s doing and we can always bail him out if something happens.”

“I suppose.” Bentley sighed. He gently moved the Princess’ Egg to one side and opened up his laptop bringing up a coding program he’d been working on. What was the worst that could happen really? Sly was too fast to catch and despite Bentley’s suspicions it was like Sly had said, he wasn’t just going to bump into Carmelita on the street. 

Murray put a sandwich down at his elbow and Bentley nodded his thanks. His computer was still linked to Sly’s binocucom and the sound of wind and the distant hum of the city was an almost comforting white noise as he worked. He took a thoughtful bite of his sandwich, chewing slowly as he puzzled over a problem in his code when a video feed popped up over his program. Bentley’s mouth fell open, dropping half-eaten sandwich into his lap.

_No! This WAS NOT possible_.

“Bentley? You okay there pal?” Murray came over to stand behind his chair. “Oh.”

The two of them stared at the video on the screen, she was impossible to miss her yellow beanie, matching parka and bright fur standing out starkly against the dull grey of the darkened street. Completely unmistakable, standing there, gloved hands curled around a takeaway cup from one of the nearby vendors was Inspector Carmelita Fox.

“What? How? How did he? WHAT IS SHE DOING HERE???” Bentley scrambled for his earpiece. _He was going to have words with Sly_.

Murray put a gentle hand on his shoulder. “Wait, give him a minute.”

“Give him a minute? Murray we have to get Sly out of there before Inspector Fox sees him.”

The feed zoomed in lingering on Carmelita’s face, she looked tired. Smaller somehow even beneath her bulky winter clothes. Bentley felt a stab of guilt, it was partly his fault that she was here after all. The feed blinked out, Sly must have put his binocucom away but the computer was still picking up audio from his earpiece.

There was the sound of rushing wind as Sly jumped down from his perch to the street below, Bentley could guess what was coming next and sunk his head into his hands groaning, all his hard work.

“Inspector Fox.”

_Yep there it was, months down the drain_. Bentley took a moment to silently curse Sly and his damn libido.

“Cooper?” Carmelita’s voice, faint and tinny with distance drifted out the computer. “What… what are you doing here?”

“Looking for you.” Sly said smoothly.

“How did you even… How did you find me?” Her voice held a note that Bentley couldn’t quite place.

“I heard Morozov was going to be in town and knowing you I figured if there’s a criminal you’re after here, you’d be nearby. So I asked around, you’ve been buying hot chocolate from that stall all week, people remember you.” And Bentley could hear the smile in Sly’s voice.

“That sneaky devil.” Bentley hissed. “He planned all this.” If he weren’t so annoyed, Bentley would be impressed.

“I still don’t understand, why are you here?” Carmelita said.

“Because I missed you.” Sly said once again with that level of frightening honesty that Bentley hadn’t heard from him in years.

_Oh no_.

“Didn’t you miss me too?” Sly continued sounding so hopeful, like his whole damn heart was on display with the question.

This was bad, this was exactly what Bentley had been trying to avoid.

“Didn’t you?” Sly asked again.

He must have moved a lot closer because as clear as a bell Bentley heard Carmelita give a breathless little gasp before she whispered, “yes.”

At that point, Murray reached over and shut the lid of the laptop killing the audio.

“What are you doing?” Bentley turned to look at him.

“I think we should give them some privacy don’t you? Besides there are somethings you really don’t want to hear.”

Bentley thought of Sly and Carmelita making out in the store cupboard, this couldn’t possibly be any worse as that. “Still we shouldn’t just go dark, what if Sly needs us?” He opened the laptop back up and as the audio kicked back in, he promptly shut the laptop again. _Nope!_ This was way worse than the store cupboard. Sly was on his own. “…well.” He said looking at Murray. “Now what?”

“I think there’s a deck of cards around here somewhere, wanna play Go Fish?”

Bentley cleared his laptop from the table. “Sure why not.”

 

A not inconsiderable amount of time later Sly slipped back into the hideout. Bentley and Murray looked up from their game and Sly grinned guiltily at them,

“Uh hey guys.”

Wordlessly Murray held out a fist for Sly to bump, which he did.

“Umm… thanks? What was that for?”

“You left your comm on.” Bentley said flatly.

“Oh. Ooooh….” Sly said.

“You lied to us.” Bentley said jabbing an accusing finger at Sly.

“I didn’t… as such…”

“That’s why you brought us all the way out here. For her.”

Sly gestured to the Fabergé egg on the table, “I brought us out here for a heist. I didn’t know Carmelita would be here…”

“Like Hell you didn’t!” Bentley stood on his seat.

“I hoped that she’d be here. I’m glad I found her, I spoke to her Bentley she’s miserable, she hates it here but I think we can help. I have an idea for how we can get her back to Paris…”

“What?” Bentley spluttered. “No. Absolutely not.”

“No, no look if Morozov get put away then she can apply to come home. Things can go back to normal.”

“Normal?” Bentley yelled. “Nothing has been normal since she showed up. Do you have any idea how hard I had to work. How long it took me to get rid of her? I’m not just going to turn around and bring her back.”

Sly was staring at him with a strange expression on his face.

“…Bentley.” Murray said very softly.

“You did what?” Sly said.

_Oh shit_.

“I…” Bentley stammered. “I…”

“You sent her out here?” Sly said angrily. “You’re the… reason she? Bentley this Morozov guy is dangerous, he _kills_ people in law enforcement.”

“I didn’t know that at the time.” Bentley, still standing on his seat threw his hands up.

Sly let out a long sigh, closing his eyes and when he opened them again he sounded calmer. “Okay, what’s done is done. Like I said I have an idea for how we can get Carmelita out of here before she gets hurt, we just…”

“No.” Bentley interrupted.

“No?” Sly blinked, clearly confused that Bentley was refusing to take what Sly clearly saw as an olive branch. “What do you mean no?”

“I mean I am not helping you get a dangerous liability back on our case. Every time Carmelita shows up you make bad decisions. You outright ignore my plans, you put all three of us in danger, so no I am not going up against a volatile Russian mobster so that you can keep flirting with Inspector Fox.”

Sly’s eyes narrowed. “Fine.” He snapped coldly. “Fine.” And in one fluid motion, he swiped the Princess’ Egg from the table and leapt back out the window into the inky blue night.

“Sly? Sly!” Bentley and Murray yelled after him rushing to the window. The two of them exchanged a look.

“Where do you think he’s going?” Murray asked.

Bentley wrung his hands, he had a feeling it wasn’t to return the Princess’ Egg to the museum. “He’ll come back.” He said. “He’ll come back soon I’m sure.”

 

The night stretched on, still Sly didn’t return and his comm stayed stubbornly off.

“Do you think he’s okay?” Murray asked.

“For all we know he’s gone back to make out with Inspector Fox some more.” Bentley muttered but he couldn’t shake the worried, uneasy feeling in his gut.

“Can’t you track him?” Murray said. “With the GPS in our binocucoms?”

“Not when he’s turned it off.” Bentley stared out the window letting out a heavy sigh. “He said he’d be back before dawn.”

“That was before he got mad and ran off.” Murray pointed out.

“I know.” Bentley said slamming his hands down on the desk in front of him. “I get it, this is all my fault but I was just trying… I thought I was doing what was best.”

“It’s not your fault Bentley.” Murray said gently. “But y’know next time something like this happens maybe we can talk about it first?”

“I sincerely hope that there won’t be a next time Murray.”

There was a crackle of static from Bentley’s computer.

“That’s Sly’s comm.” Bentley said searching the table for his earpiece. From the comm low voices could be heard nearby and there was no street noise, Bentley frowned _was Sly hiding somewhere? Where was he?_ Finding his earpiece Bentley placed it in his ear but before he could say anything Sly spoke,

“As fun as this has been guys I have other places to be. So untie me maybe?”

There was the heavy sound of a blow, “shut up. What do we do with him? Should we call the boss?”

“Boss said no calls while he’s out with his fancy museum lady.” Another voice, this one further away answered. “Leave him, he’ll keep ‘til the boss gets back in the morning.”

“Morozov has a date? That’s adorable.” Sly said. 

There was another sound of a punch connecting. “I said shut up.” The first voice snapped.

Sly spat what was probably blood. “Look guys, like I said this is all a big misunderstanding. No need to bother your boss, you just let me go and I leave this very lovely house of yours and no harm, no foul.”

A third blow struck, the sound making both Bentley and Murray flinch.

“Stop hitting him Mischa, the boss is going to want him alive.” The second voice instructed, then gaining volume as he moved closer said. “Mister Morozov does not take kindly to thieves or spies.” He snapped his fingers and moved away still talking. “Make your peace with your chosen gods raccoon. We’ll see you in the morning.” There was the sound of a door slamming and then silence.

Bentley yanked out his earpiece and looked at Murray who had gone very pale, “Morozov has Sly.” Bentley whispered.

“This is bad. What do we do?” Murray clawed at his cheeks.

“I don’t know… I… I need to think.”

“Should we try talking to Sly? If he managed to turn his binocucom back on he might be able to hear us.”

“There might be a guard in the room with him, I wouldn’t want to tip them off.” Bentley pulled up the location tracker for the binocucoms, Sly was in a very upmarket residential area of the city. Well he had said he was in a ‘very nice house’. “Okay so we know where he is but… nothing else. I have no information on Morozov and Sly doesn’t have the time for us to gather any.” Bentley felt himself begin to shake, what were they going to do? If they didn’t act fast Sly was going to become another blacked out entry on Morozov’s rap sheet.

Beside him Murray sniffled perilously close to tears, “what are we going to do Bentley?”

“I don’t… I don’t…” Bentley didn’t have the information he needed, much less the ability to act on it. Fieldwork was Sly’s job, Sly was the one who ran around getting in and out of dangerous places. If Morozov’s goons had managed to catch Sly of all people then what chance did Bentley and Murray have?

It wasn’t as if they had even half of Sly’s abilities, Murray could hold his own in a fight but he wasn’t built for stealth and Bentley could make a plan but he was not built to go into field. That was why they needed Sly, they didn’t have anyone else they could turn to, who even came close… wait…

“Murray I think I have an idea.” He said.

Someone who could move almost as well as Sly, someone who hold their own in a fight, someone who had access to the information on Morozov that Bentley lacked. Someone brilliant enough to formulate a plan.

Bentley didn’t think he’d ever hear himself say this but they needed Carmelita Fox.

 

It didn’t take much for Bentley to get a private line into the Usurper Taskforce, he asked for Carmelita by name saying he was an old friend from Paris and that it was an emergency. He drummed his fingers as he waited,

“This is Inspector Fox." Carmelita answered curtly. "Who are you and how did you get this number?”

Bentley cleared his throat, “Inspector Fox I have information about Sly Cooper. It’s urgent, can you meet me...”

“No.” She interrupted. “You will meet me at the entrance to Solaris Park in ten minutes and if this is some kind of trap I will make you regret it.”

The line went dead and Bentley stared at the phone in his hand, _... that had gone well?_

“Did she agree to meet?” Murray asked timidly.

“Yeah but she changed the meet up, can you get me across town in ten minutes?”

Murray perked up at that and he brought his fists together in front of himself. “Neither sleet, nor snow, nor speeding fines can phase THE MURRAY!”

Bentley nodded. “Great let’s go.”

 

Carmelita was waiting at the park when they arrived, she was sitting on a bench one irritated foot tapping, compulsively checking her watch.

Bentley hesitated before he approached her, this would be the first time they had met face to face. It was funny, on paper, they knew each other quite well. In fact, it wouldn’t surprise Bentley at all if Carmelita had all three members of the Cooper Gang’s original birth records and Bentley had spent the last year pouring over Carmelita’s personnel file trying to find out what made her tick.

He took a breath, “Inspector Fox?”

Carmelita’s head snapped up. “You?”

“Me.” Bentley nodded, “may I?” He gestured to the bench, Carmelita nodded and Bentley hopped up beside her.

“What are you doing here? Where’s Cooper?” She frowned suspiciously, looking around as though she expected Sly to appear at any second.

“That’s why I asked to meet you.” Bentley said relieved that they could get straight to the point. “Morozov has Sly.”

“What? No that’s not possible. I just saw him a few hours ago he…” She trailed off turning away. “You’d know about that I suppose.”

Bentley coughed, “technically yes. Sly may have left his comm on but we muted the… you know what that doesn’t matter.” Bentley waved a hand. “Look after he, uh saw you he came back to the hideout and we had an argument and Sly left and he somehow got captured by Morozov. We had audio from his comm for a little while but now it’s dead again.”

“And what d you want from me?”

“Morozov is dangerous, he’ll kill Sly. Your team must have information on the house and the equipment to raid it, if Sly gets captured that’s still a better option than him dying.”

Carmelita looked down at her gloved hands, “they won’t go in.”

“Whuh… what?”

“The other members of the taskforce, they keep saying they’re waiting on Morozov to do something big, some scheme he can’t use his legal team to wiggle out of, before they risk the operation on a raid. I’ve seen them let some pretty questionable things slide.” She looked haunted and far away for a moment. “Morozov having another criminal in his house? They won’t mobilise for that.”

The world spun and Bentley gripped the edge of the bench. “He’ll die.” He whispered, this had been his best hope and it was falling away. _This was his fault, this was all his fault_.

“No.” Carmelita said fiercely. “The team might not go in for Sly but I will. No one messes with my criminal, besides I owe him for…”

“Boss Medio.” Bentley nodded.

Carmelita’s eyes narrowed, “that sneak! He swore he wouldn’t tell.”

Bentley paled under her glare, “he didn’t… there was a camera and I was hacked into the security feed and…” Bentley was babbling. “Wait, wait we don’t have time for this, we have to get you into Morozov’s house and out with Sly before dawn.”

Carmelita stood brushing down her trousers. “Not just me, you’re coming too.”

“Me? What part of me looks like I belong in the field?” Bentley gestured at himself. “This is why we need you.”

“Morozov is paranoid about security, the system he has here is just as intense as the one he has on his house in Moscow. It can only be accessed from the inside, if we have any hope of getting Sly out of there alive then I’m going to need you to come in with me.”

Bentley wanted to protest and keep protesting but they didn’t have time. Hadn’t Bentley said that he would protect his friend? “Alright Inspector.” He nodded. “I’ll go with you.”

“Good man.” Carmelita put out a hand to him.

Bentley shook it, “okay our van is around the corner, let’s go get a plan together.”

Carmelita looked up at the lightening sky above them. “Let’s hope we’re not too late.”


	3. The Getaway

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> FUN FACT: While I was finishing the edits on this chapter the MOMENT I HIT SAVE Word crashed. I actually felt my heart stop and let out a SUCH A WAIL that I woke my housemate from a dead sleep. Luckily I managed to recover the document including my edits, but the fear was real though let me tell you.
> 
> The fear was real.
> 
> Anyway so here it is in all it's glory the final installment I hope you all enjoy.

This was not how Bentley usually operated, normally he liked to be able to plan for every contingency but tonight every minute was precious, as dawn and their deadline crept inexorably closer.

“Alright.” Carmelita said as the three of them knelt on the floor of the van amidst a spread of papers. “This is more than likely the access point that Sly used.” She tapped a drain under the fence on their hastily drawn floor plan. “Then there’s an external terminal for the security system about… here.” She drew a vague circle with her finger and made a frustrated noise running a hand through her dark curls. “This would be more accurate if I had access to our surveillance photos.”

“Oh here.” Bentley said bringing up the Usurper Taskforce files on his laptop.

Carmelita’s brows knitted together as she frowned at him, “…remind me to change my passwords later, but no there’s only physical copies of most of our files.”

Bentley had thought that the task force’s files were a little bare for a group that had been operating for over two years. “Ah.”

“My Captain is almost as paranoid as Morozov.” Carmelita explained. “Always fretting about how cyber security ‘isn’t real’… now I’m thinking he may have a point.” She arched an eyebrow at Bentley. “If you can put some of those criminal skills to use to hack that external terminal we can get into the house. Unfortunately I don’t have any ideas where they might be holding Sly.”

“That’s alright, that I know.” Bentley said. “If I’ve done my math right, and I always do my math right Sly’s somewhere on the eastern side of the house on the second floor.” He made a large black X on the floor plan. 

Carmelita nodded, “good.” She looked up. “Stick close behind me when we go in, I’ll try and keep you safe.”

“Th… thank you.” Bentley said, swallowing hard. Behind him Murray came up and gripped his shoulder, Bentley patted his friend’s hand in thanks. “We should… we should get moving.” His voice only shook a little and the tremor in his hands was slight enough to hide. His stomach was in knots but he was ready to fix this.

He looked at Carmelita, she was standing now fists on her hips, feet apart, shoulders back, tail swishing restlessly. She looked strong, capable, formidable. 

How strange it was to think that they were (however temporarily) allied. Once again, Bentley thought, it was easy to see why Sly liked her. Sly loved a challenge and here was the closest person he had to an equal in his field, just on the opposite side of the law.

He watched Carmelita check the shock pistol at her hip. _She likes Sly too_ , Bentley thought to himself. _Oh! Oh that would explain… well everything really_.  
_Was it difficult for her?_ Bentley wondered. Everything was a game to Sly but from what he had learned about Carmelita he knew that she took her work seriously. And yet here she was helping them again, this wasn’t Clockwerk, an immortal monster outside the law. She was going behind the backs of the people she worked with, she was breaking the law surely she wouldn’t do that unless she…

Bentley nearly asked her about this, about her feelings but changed his mind at the last second, swallowing the question. He liked being attached to his teeth, thank you very much _!_

“Ready?” Carmelita asked him.

“Umm yes.” Bentley nodded, ready as he’d ever be.

“Good luck guys.” Murray lifted Bentley into a back cracking hug. “Be careful and bring Sly home safe.” Murray then tried to approach Carmelita for the same treatment but she held up a hand and shook her head. Murray drooped. “I wish I could come too.” He said.

“Just keep the van running Murray, we’ll be in and out before you know it.” Bentley said with far more confidence than he felt as he hopped out of the van to join Carmelita on the street.

Spinning on her heel Carmelita strode toward Morozov’s house, Bentley paused turning, lifting a hand to wave to Murray standing mournfully at the open doors of the van before hurrying to catch up with Carmelita.

 

The two of them crouched half hidden on the corner. Bentley watched his breath misting in the still night air, in that trick often played by the early hours before dawn it was far colder now than it had been earlier in the night. Bentley wondered if he had ever been this cold in his life, he shot a glance at Carmelita she’d ditched her yellow parka and hat and was only wearing a high necked dark thermal. Bentley willed his teeth to stop chattering, Carmelita wasn’t showing the slightest sign of discomfort despite the fact that she must have been nearly as cold as Bentley was.

“So Morozov’s men rotate guard shifts every few hours, we’ll have a small window to get under the fence and get you to the terminal.”

“R… right.” Bentley needed to focus.

“Let’s go.” Carmelita said and took off at a run, slipping across the street toward the high stone fence. She double checked that the coast was clear and beckoned to Bentley, he scurried over nervous sweat beading on his forehead.

There was a small drain culvert under the fence, kneeling down Carmelita probed it and the bars shifted. This was definitely how Sly had gotten in. Quick as a flash Carmelita was down on her belly and through the opening, taking a deep breath Bentley followed. 

“Okay the terminal should be just around the corner.” Carmelita drew her shock pistol, holding it in a low ready position. “I’ll cover you, let’s go.”

Bentley swallowed, nodded once and the two of them started moving again, the terminal was right where they had hoped it would be and Bentley approached it. His hands were shaking so badly by now that he failed to get access and for a moment the world shrank down, like he was looking through a tunnel, the edges of his vision going dark and he felt everything tilt dramatically. 

_NO_. He told himself. _He could do this, this was what he was good at. He could do this, he could save Sly_. He took a few deep breaths, the freezing air burning in his lungs grounding him.

He got access on the second try, getting into the system was like falling into the steps of a well remembered dance and he was able to go through the motions with comfortable familiarity.

First step, find the master code. In the early days when Bentley had been teaching himself to hack, he’d thought of it like a video game imagining himself as little green ship shooting down enemies as he shut down the system’s internal securities.

Second step, alter the code. He was startled as a shot from Carmelita’s pistol zipped past him, he yelped in surprise and clapped a hand to his mouth to cover the noise. A guard slumped unconscious to the ground, Bentley stared at the smoke drifting off the wolf’s coat.

“He didn’t see us.” Carmelita said. “I’ve got you, keep going.”

Bentley’s head bobbed as he nodded nervously, _right_. 

Third step, take control. He stripped the existing commands from the system and rewrote them.

Fourth step, lock the system. He threw up new passwords and firewalls, changing codes . Now unless they an original voice print override no one was getting back into the system tonight, and Bentley had it on good authority that Morozov was not taking calls this evening.

“Alright I’m in, the system is down… now.”

“Good.” Carmelita nodded shortly. “Let’s keep moving before the next patrol comes. There’s a side door, this way.” Keeping close to the wall she set off at half crouched run.”

Staying as close as he could without treading on Carmelita’s tail Bentley followed her into the house, through the kitchen, and then along a darkened hallway. There was a unreal feeling to the house, the kind of unsettling sensation you got being awake when you knew everyone else was asleep.

“Wait.” Carmelita hissed, grabbing Bentley by the back of his shell and throwing them both into an empty room as a pair of guards walked past muttering to each other. They waited a moment before Carmelita poked her head out. “Clear.” She said. “Let’s go.”

Bentley barely had time to catch his breath or calm his thundering heart. Adrenaline had him shaking in every limb, _how did Sly do this all the time?_ Always managing to sound so calm and unruffled. Even with a plan, even knowing someone had your back this was terrifying.

Carmelita cat footed up the stairs to the second floor, one of the steps creaked loudly under Bentley’s foot. They both froze in place, Bentley went light-headed with panic, looking back at him Carmelita jerked her head in a clear ‘keep moving’ gesture. Clinging to the struts of the bannister Bentley crawled slowly up the final few steps to the landing and sat against the top of the stairs head between his knees breathing shakily.

Carmelita grabbed his arm and pulled him to his feet. “Come on man, keep it together. You can do this.” She cast a worried glance around the landing. “I know you can. I need you to show me where Sly is remember?”

 _Yes, yes they needed to find Sly_. “Okay. Okay, I’m sorry.”

As they proceeded they rounded a corner coming face to face with a surprised guard, he opened his mouth but before he could call out he collapsed to the floor smoking faintly from Carmelita’s pistol.

“Help me move him.” Carmelita muttered holstering the pistol. They dragged the unconscious leopard to the nearest room but it was locked, grumbling Carmelita pulled out a ring of keys and tried them until one open the door.

“Where did you…?”

“From the guard outside.” Carmelita said not quite looking at him. She closed the door, locking it again.

“You’re… good at this.” Bentley blinked at her, she’d make a great thief. Not that Bentley dared say that out loud, he still liked keeping his teeth where they were.

Carmelita shifted looking faintly embarrassed, “you uh… learn a few things when you chase criminals otherwise you always end up a step behind.” She tucked the keys away and drew her pistol again. “Now where’s Sly?”

Bentley took a moment to orientate himself before identifying which of the rooms was the one Sly had most likely been stashed in. “Here.” He said pointing. 

They braced themselves on either side of the door. “I’ll go first.” Carmelita whispered tossing Bentley the keys. 

Bentley fumbled the catch and the keys jangled noisily, there was two breaths of silence but no guards appeared and with shaking hands Bentley unlocked the door.

As it swung open Carmelita swept in first, checking for hostiles. “Clear.” She whispered then, “Sly…”

Bentley hurried inside, there was Sly bound to a chair his head hanging forward. Carmelita rushed over to him, she knelt in front of his chair and produced a small flick knife from her boot using it to start cutting away his bonds.

“Is that a…?”

“Rule number twelve,” Carmelita muttered slightly distractedly. “Always carry a knife.”

Sly stirred, “Carmelita?” He looked terrible, they’d really done a number on him.

“Hey Ringtail.” Carmelita shot him a quick smile.

“Boy am I glad to see… Bentley?!?” He caught sight of his friend behind Carmelita and his eyes widened. “No, no Carmelita please let him go. I’ll come quietly, please just don’t…”

“It’s okay Sly.” Bentley reassured. “We came here together to get you out. I’m not under arrest.”

Sly relaxed marginally. “Oh.” He shot Carmelita a small, bruised smile. “So you’ve come to my rescue? Why Inspector you do care.”

“Trying to save your life here Cooper.” Carmelita said bending her head to cut the bindings at his feet. “Could you maybe not spoil the moment by being smug?”

“Oh. Right. Sorry.”

Carmelita got to her feet. “Can you stand?”

Stiffly Sly pushed himself to his feet and took Carmelita’s outstretched hand. “I’m fine.” He said in such a way that Bentley knew meant he was not fine, not in the slightest.

Bentley grabbed Sly’s cane from where it had been propped against a wall and passed it back to him. Sly took it mechanically, he was staring at Carmelita.

“Oh jeez.” Bentley sighed.

“Why did you come?” Sly asked softly.

Carmelita was doing inventory of his battered face, fingers ghosting over each swelling mark. “No one hurts my criminal.”

“Is that the only reason?” There was no space left between them anymore and Bentley was pretty sure they had both forgotten that he was still standing right next to them.

“Sly…” Carmelita whispered, one hand still on his cheek the other caught against his chest. Her voice was very soft, there was that yearning in it again.

Bentley felt incredibly awkward standing there intruding on this very private feeling moment. “Uh guys?” He hissed. “Morozov? Our lives? The overwhelming time pressure?”

The two of them snapped their gazes back to him and Carmelita pushed away from Sly, cheeks burning.

“Bentley’s right.” She said shock pistol in hand once more. “Let’s get out of here.”

 

The three of them moved back into the hallway, creeping along in a line. At the second floor landing they heard raised voices and running feet, someone had realised something was not right.

“We need to get downstairs and out the nearest window.” Carmelita said hurrying down the stairs. “Before the three of us end up floating in pieces in the Baltic.”

“The windows are alarmed.” Sly said weakly. “That’s how they got me.”

“Not anymore, Bentley turned off the system.”

“Hey nice work pal.” Sly said reaching over to pat Bentley on the back. “That means the motion detectors are off, we can go over the fence.”

Bentley risked a glance back at Sly, “are you sure?”

Carmelita pushed into the nearest room to the stairs and unlatched the window. She leant out, half hanging off the sill she fired two quick shots outside, then turned back beckoning to Bentley and Sly. “Hurry.”

“I’m fine Bentley.” Sly said ushering Bentley into the room and closing the door behind them. “Or at least fine enough to climb over a dumb fence.” 

Sly and Carmelita helped Bentley climb out the window into the garden, a pair of guards lay to either side of the window.

Bentley skirted around them gingerly, _gee that pistol of Carmelita’s was useful, when it wasn’t pointed at them_.

“Where’s Murray?” Sly whispered.

“Waiting with the van on the western side of the house. I’ll tell him where to find us when we get out of here.” Bentley hissed climbing onto Sly’s back.

Sly put his cane between his teeth, Bentley felt him wince as he took Bentley’s weight and tensed for the climb.

“Hey!” A voice called, they’d been spotted.

“Go.” Carmelita ordered.

“Carmelita…” Bentley said as Sly made a noise of protest around his cane.

“Go.” She repeated. “I am right behind you.”

Sly began to climb, behind them there was the crackling sound of Carmelita’s pistol firing then barely a second later she appeared next to them on the top of the fence.

Bentley blinked in astonishment, _had she jumped?_

Sly and Bentley hit the ground, Carmelita making an elegant three point landing beside them. Bentley slid off Sly’s back and pulled out his binocucom.

Carmelita caught his wrist. “Not here.” She said shaking her head, shock pistol already in her hand again. “We need to get out of sight of the house. Run.”

They didn’t need to be told twice, the three of them taking off running finally taking shelter a few streets over on the lee side of another giant house. Bentley contacted Murray advising him on the new collection point and then he collapsed in a boneless heap on the pavement. He lay there for a moment dignity forgotten, groaning softly.

Sly laughed, because of course he did. Because of course Sly would find the humour in this. He crouched beside Bentley, “hey pal you did get great.” He encouraged Bentley to stand. “Thanks for the save.”

Leaning on Sly Bentley managed to stand on wobbly legs. “You’re welcome, let’s not do that again in a hurry.”

“Yeah, you got it pal.” Sly said patting Bentley’s shoulder. He then stood and turned Carmelita. “I owe you a thank you too Inspector.”

Carmelita wasn’t looking at Sly, “don’t mention it.” She muttered.

Sly moved closer, “no I owe you.”

Bentley rolled his eyes, _here we go again_.

Carmelita shook her head, “no you don’t…”

“Carmelita.”

That caused her to look at him, the soft longing in the way he said her name.

“I…” She stuttered. “I… I wasn’t going to let you die.” She said finally.

“Thank you. I mean it.”

Carmelita looked away again, wrapping her arms around herself as she shivered. Sly moved a step closer and Carmelita let him, leaning into him, ostensibly for the warmth he offered but Bentley didn’t miss the way her fingers dug into his shirt and how she rested her head on his shoulder.

“I’m glad you’re okay.” She whispered.

Sly wrapped an arm around her shoulders, holding her against himself contentedly. “All the better for seeing you.”

 

There was the sound of screeching tires and the van came to a squealing halt in front of them. Murray wound down his window. “Hey guys.”

“Hey Big Guy, good to see you.” Sly grinned opening the door for Carmelita who hesitated. 

“It’s below freezing out here.” Bentley pointed out, “at least let us give you a ride across town.”

Carmelita pressed her lips together, making some kind if internal decision before she took Sly’s hand and climbed into the van. 

 

They dropped Carmelita around the corner from her HQ, Sly jumped out of the van to say goodbye. He bent over her hand kissing it and murmured something that caused Carmelita to narrow her eyes suspiciously. Sly just smiled at her and shrugged, then he turned away to let her go.

“Cooper.” Carmelita called after him. He started to turn and Carmelita closed the distance, grabbing two fistfuls of his shirt, spinning him around and kissing him soundly before pushing him away.

Her gaze flicked up to the van, meeting Bentley’s eyes she nodded once, a gesture that spoke volumes. A ‘thank you’, a ‘you did well’ and something heavier, a kind of understanding. Then she pulled up the hood of her parka and walked away.

“C’mon Sly.” Bentley said to his friend, standing spellbound in the middle of the road watching the gentle swing of Carmelita’s tail. “Let’s go home.”

Sly leapt back into the van and he and Bentley pulled the doors closed. “Yeah pal, home sounds good.”

 

“What did you say to Carmelita? As we were leaving.” Bentley asked.

The three of them were safely back in the hideout, Murray had cried over Sly, hugging him and dropping fat, wet tears on top of his head. Bentley had patched up Sly as best he could, bandaging his face and what had turned out to be a couple of fractured ribs. And now the three of them were sitting around the table, mugs of coffee in front of them, watching the sun come up over St Petersburg.

“Oh.” Sly said scratching his cheek. “I just happened to mention the heist at the Hermitage Museum and that she might find what was stolen in Morozov’s study.”

Bentley frowned, “surely the police already know you stole the Princess’ Egg.”

Sly took a sip of his coffee. “I might have… forgotten to leave a calling card.”

“You really did plan all of this.” Bentley said astounded, he honestly hadn’t thought Sly would have that level of deviousness in him.

“Not really.” Sly confessed. “The getting captured and beaten up was definitely not part of the plan. Thanks again for the save by the way.”

“You’re welcome. But the rest, bringing us here, framing Morozov, finding Carmelita, you planned all that by yourself?”

“Sort of, I went looking for jobs in Russia because I hoped I might see Carmelita. Then when I heard about the gala I called in a few favours to see if Morozov would attend. Trying to get Carmelita home was something I came up with on the fly.” He took another drink of his coffee. “Let me tell you pal I’m leaving the planning to you in the future.”

“And so you should.”

“Why didn’t you leave a calling card?” Murray asked.

Sly’s mouth twisted, “it just didn’t sit right. I wasn’t sure I wanted to advertise that I’d stolen the ‘last beloved treasure’ of a kidnapped eight year old.” He held up his fingers to mime air quotes. “I figured I’d leave a card when I returned it.”

Murray leant forward. “Do you think Carmelita will use what you told her?”

“I hope so.” Sly said. He took a deep breath. “I owe you guys an apology. I have been reckless around Carmelita and I’m sorry for not listening I just…”

“You really like her.” Bentley finished for him, turning his mug round and round in his hands. “And she feels the same.”

“Carmelita said that?” Sly perked.

“No it was just something I saw.” Bentley said. “I’m sorry too, that I sent her away.”

“If she comes home…” Sly began. “I won’t… I’ll _try_ not to act like this again. I don’t want to see you guys in danger because of what I’ve done, I was really scared when I saw you’d come to save me and I thought you’d been arrested.”

“She’ll come home.” Bentley said quietly. “And I accept your apology.”

Sly grinned reaching over to grip Bentley’s shoulder. “You did great. Out in the field.”

“Thanks.” Bentley said. “I hated it.”

Sly chuckled, “well it’s good to know that if I need you on a job…”

“Please don’t.” Bentley interrupted, he’d do it but one night of heart stopping terror was more than enough for one lifetime. “Please don’t need me.”

Sly just laughed… because of course he did. “I’ll keep that in mind pal. I’ll keep that in mind.”

And just like that things slotted back into place, their usual natural and easy camaraderie falling back over them. _Life or death would do that to you_ , Bentley supposed. _Show you what was really important_.

Things would be the same but things would be different too. Bentley finished his coffee looking out at the sunrise but that was okay. After tonight Bentley was prepared for anything.

As the Cooper Gang prepared to leave St Petersburg the whole city was buzzing with the news of Boris Korsakoff Dobromir Morozov’s arrest after the missing Princess’ Egg was recovered from his home. Bentley caught sight of Sly staring fondly at the front page of a newspaper, there was a large photo of the Usurper Taskforce, including Carmelita overseeing Morozov’s arrest.

Bentley just shook his head, continuing with his pack up. Maybe the Gang would get in one last heist before Carmelita came back.

“Where do we want to go now?” Murray asked carrying a box past.

“I hear there’s a pretty epic heavy metal festival going on in Helsinki.” Sly said folding away the paper. “Wanna go check it out?”

Murray flashed the sign of the horns. “Heck yeah.”

Sly looked to Bentley who nodded, Bentley liked Finland.

Sly grinned stretching, “it’s decided then. Let’s get going.”

* * *

It was two months later, Bentley was in the back of the van listening to the blaring of alarms and the wailing of sirens as Sly fled across rooftops laughing. And echoing behind him like the missing notes of a melody was Carmelita’s furious voice.

“GET BACK HERE COOPER!”

Sly addressed Bentley through the comm. “Okay Bentley I’m five minutes out, I’m just going to say a quick hello to our lovely Inspector.”

Bentley sighed, “sure Sly just…”

“Leave my comm on and don’t get caught. No worries Bentley I got this.” Sly finished cheerfully.

Bentley shook his head, it was good to have things back to normal. As he half listened to Sly melodramatically ask Carmelita for a date, a notification pinged on his computer. He brought it up, a keyword from one of his databases had been flagged.

_Ooh no _. Bentley sucked in a worried breath. He was going to have to talk with the guys when Sly got back.__

__The Clockwerk parts had been released as evidence and had been handed over to the Museum of Natural History in Cairo._ _

__And Bentley knew what that meant, the Cooper Gang were going to Egypt._ _


End file.
